JIMBO

 

I got a new dog from Battersea

And I have called him Jimbo

I now take him to obedience classes

Where they walk us to and fro

 

But when he should be at heel

Jimbo almost always runs away

And then he comes bounding back

When he is supposed to sit and stay

 

Then when he’s walking on the lead

I have to pull young Jimbo back

Or he’s round and round my feet

Until I end up lying on my back

 

We’ve stopped going to the classes

And I have a stick for him to chase

I can forgive my Jimbo anything

When he jumps up to lick my face

WILDERNESS

 

The fierce sun burned the land

Cracking stone, bleaching bone

Drying the rich earth to dust

To be blown on the four winds

Or washed away by unforgiving rains

So infrequent in their coming

 

Unable to penetrate the iron earth

Rain-washed off the barren land

Like it was a repellent oily hide

Leaving it sterile and infertile

To all but natures hardiest

Most determined to cling to life

 

In the fast-expanding wilderness

Beneath rocks and stones life goes on

Insects toil industriously on

While un-germinated seeds bide their time

Until nature smiles once more

On this harsh and arid land

I AM

 

I am the gentle warmth

Of a soft spring day

I am the sunlight

Glinting on the morning dew

I am the summer breeze

In a field of ripened corn

I am the aromatic air

Of a summer night

I am the autumn wind

Stripping bare the trees

I am the howling wind

In the teeth of a gale

I am the biting sting

Of icy rain and sleet

I am the silence

In the softly falling snow

I am silent

And invisible in the mists

I am the storm and tempest

I am the peace and quiet

I am the green man

I am the green goddess

I am the mother

THE BIRD WATCHER

 

Upon the wooded hill

The forest sentinel stood

Made from wind falls

Wooden scraps and ullage

Skilfully fashioned

To become, complete with binoculars

The birdwatcher

But all was not as it seemed

For the sentinel

Destined to forever study

What fell before his gaze

Every autumn

Turned his attention upon

His favorite birch tree

Who when the autumn wind blew

Began to shed her leafy canopy

All the year round he studied

In detail her fully covered form

But in the autumn, he could

Revel in her nakedness

The sentinel spoke to himself

“Oh, I’m getting a woody”

And with that his sap began to rise

“Oh no too soon, too soon”

Then all too suddenly it was over

So, upon the wooded hill

The frustrated forest sentinel stood

Staring through his binoculars

And telling himself

“There’s always next year”

Uncanny Tales – (009) Spring was in the air

 

The lightning struck, intensely bright, followed in almost the same instance by the thunderclap directly overhead, so loud that it shook the car and then the rain began and fell heavily in large drops beating a frantic tune on the car roof, then almost as quickly as the dark skies arrived they were gone and the sun was out again, although it was a few moments before the April shower stopped completely and a rainbow appeared in the sky.

We were parked by the village green, which was patterned with strips of freshly cut grass and when we got out of the car the mixture of sun, rain and cut grass produced a smell that was quite intoxicating.

We locked the car and headed down the lane and as if the switch on a great sound system had been flicked on, the bird life in the trees bordering the green exploded into a cacophony of sound as they emerged from their shelters to go about their spring business.

We turned off the lane into the woods where nature and man had both left their mark.

The areas that had once been coppiced or pollarded now went their own way and the woods were full of life.

On the borders of the woods the old cut and lay hedge and the ancient hedgerows along the lanes teamed with a great abundance of life of all kinds.

A sobering reflection on this idyllic scene is that all the visible life was either predator or prey but that did not detract from its beauty in fact it enhanced it if anything.

However the skies darkened again and the rain started to fall and we had to make a dash for the car, but by the time we reached the car we were soaked to the skin and we quickly scrabbled into the car as if fearful we would get even wetter if indeed that were even possible.

Just as I closed the door the lightning struck again and then the thunder shook the car violently once more.

What a wonderful and remarkable time spring is wherever you are but in the British Isles the unpredictability transforms, almost in a heartbeat, from tranquility to chaos and back again, and you know I don’t think I would want to live anywhere else.

Uncanny Tales – (046) The April Showers

 

The lightning struck, intensely bright, followed in almost the same instance by the thunderclap directly overhead, so loud that it shook the car and then the rain began and fell heavily in large drops beating a frantic tune on the car roof, then almost as quickly as the dark skies arrived they were gone and the sun was out again, although it was a few moments before the April shower stopped completely and a rainbow appeared in the sky.

We were parked by the village green, which was patterned with strips of freshly cut grass and when we got out of the car the mixture of sun, rain and cut grass produced a smell that was quite intoxicating.

We locked the car and headed down the lane and as if the switch on a great sound system had been flicked on, the bird life in the trees bordering the green exploded into a cacophony of sound as they emerged from their shelters to go about their spring business.

We turned off the lane into the woods where nature and man had both left their mark.

The areas that had once been coppiced or pollarded now went their own way and the woods were full of life.

On the borders of the woods the old cut and lay hedge and the ancient hedgerows along the lanes teamed with a great abundance of life of all kinds.

A sobering reflection on this idyllic scene is that all the visible life was either predator or prey but that did not detract from its beauty in fact it enhanced it if anything.

However the skies darkened again and the rain started to fall and we had to make a dash for the car, but by the time we reached the car we were soaked to the skin and we quickly scrabbled into the car as if fearful we would get even wetter if indeed that were even possible.

Just as I closed the door the lightning struck again and then the thunder shook the car violently once more.

What a wonderful and remarkable time spring is wherever you are but in the British Isles the unpredictability transforms, almost in a heartbeat, from tranquility to chaos and back again, and you know I don’t think I would want to live anywhere else.

THE THROWS OF SPRING

 

Its springtime

When beauty is released

Like a hand stitched

Patchwork masterpiece

Nature shows off

Her springtime finery

Spread like a throw

Overall you see

THE HILLSIDES IN MAY

 

No finer sight the eye will see,

Than the hillsides in May

A carpet of green spread out

So as to take your breath away

THE HIGH MELT

 

The high melt waters rush

Feeding springs annual event

As over the ancient rock

Water tumbles effervescent

As it heads inexorably to the sea

In its headlong descent

THE AMBLING STREAM

 

The early morning sun

Glints on the ambling stream

Where the Kingfisher hunts

And lovers go to dream

REFRESHING SPRING

 

Refreshing spring

The season of renewal

When nature will release

Her early jewels

SPRING

 

As spring comes around again

With its abundant falling rain

The rolling hills of luscious green

Are most pleasing to be seen

And with the renewal of spring

The heart lifts as if taking wing

When Daffodils break through

And spring flowers of every hue

Is there a better time on earth

To feel wealth of nature’s worth

SPRING IS HERE

 

Before the dawn has fully broken

I am all at once awoken

By wondrous songbird symphony

Though to some it is cacophony

But to hear the dawn chorus

Singing songs, loud and joyous

So, my heart is simply soaring

For the season that I’m adoring

Now that its Spring my heart is lifted

For another Spring that God has gifted

When daffodils burst from the ground

And in the breeze, they dance around

Grass is growing lush and green

The greenest that it has ever been

And with cherry blossom on the tree

Spring is here for all to see

CYCLE OF LIFE

 

God’s great cycle of life’s repeating

Springtime’s annual event occurring

As distant mountain snow is thawing

Fast flowing swollen rivers causing

Dormant Mother Nature awakening

The miracle of new life into breathing

With freshly sprouting shoots arriving

And simple sights the senses pleasing

To see the early cherry blossoming

Perfection as in God’s design believing

THE GREEN SEASON

 

Abundant rain

And warm sunshine

Paints the landscape afresh

Replacing the drabness

Of greys and browns

When the greens appear

In their infinite variety

Nature’s pallet used abundantly

Greens of every hue and shade

Fields of luscious green grasses

Trees speckled with bright buds

Like a vivid rash

Against brown limbs

Hedgerows sprout into life

While bulbs push through

The contrasting earth

Everywhere awash with viridity

Only in spring

Can the same colour

Appear in so many guises

So many variations

A veritable myriad

Across the spectrum

From dark olive to bright lime

Drab khaki to exotic emerald

Shades vivid and vibrant

And all this is but a pre cursor

Preparing the senses

For the coming

Explosion of colour

MORNING GLORY

 

It was in the bright spring morn

The birds awoke at crack of dawn

Though the light was still dim

They hop twixt branch and limb

Day begins with the dawn chorus

And starts the day for all of us

ON THE CUSP OF SPRING AND SUMMER

On the cusp of spring and summer

Hawthorn hedgerows bloom

And produce their fruity haws

Before the autumns gathering gloom

SPRING IS SPRUNG

 

Hallelujah

Its spring again

With warm sunshine

In between showers of rain

 

Hallelujah

The spring is here

It’s such a joy

All at once the senses clear

 

Hallelujah

Spring has begun

New life everywhere

All at once cobwebs are gone

 

Hallelujah

Its spring once more

This one is better

Than the one we had before

 

Hallelujah

Its spring again

Not so clever

When you’re caught in the rain

 

Hallelujah

The springs nearly over

Bloody showers

Still it will soon be summer

SUNLIGHT DANCING

Bright sunlight dances across the open water

Glinting like diamonds in the soft march winds

The surface occasionally broken by rising fish

Far-reaching ripples expand as a splash rescinds

 

Without warning the morning peace is shattered

The silence broken by breeding ducks in a brace

Flying and gliding effortlessly in perfect harmony

Until clumsily hitting the water with a lack of grace

 

An intruder and his dog appears on the lakeside path

The alarm is raised by geese honking frantically

Adult swans noisily adopt their defensive stance

Huge wings outspanned and charge dramatically

 

The once tranquil scene is lost in a cacophony 

All the nesting wildfowl have now been alerted

The intruder and his dog disappear along the path

The peace returns now the danger has been averted

 

Bright sunlight again dances across the water

Glinting like diamonds in the soft march winds

The surface occasionally broken by rising fish

Far-reaching ripples expand as a splash rescinds

REAWAKENED

 

Nature Reawakened

As The Long Winter Dies

Naked Boughs Are Dressed

Spring Causing Sap To Rise

The Resounding Birdsong

Fills Again The April Sky’s

And The Warming Earth

Releases Daff’s And Narcissi’s

THE SNOW QUEEN

The Snow Queen Banished

To Slumber Again Unseen

As Mother Nature Paints

Again, The Landscape Green

REBORN

 

Mountain snows thawing

Swollen rivers causing

Nature dormant awakening

New life into breathing

Sprouting shoots arriving

Early cherry blossoming

Annual event occurring

Life’s cycle repeating

Springtime refreshing

Simple senses pleasing

God’s design believing

CAUGHT IN THAT FIRST INSTANT

 

Caught in that first instant,

That first take from a distance

There appeared from the Woodlands edge

A kind of low misty apparition

Almost like a cloud of drifting smoke

Emerging from the tree line

Of course, when I got closer, I realized

It was just the flowering Hawthorn

WEATHER OR NOT # 2

The weather types keep on issuing they’re warning

And they keep bleating on about global warming

They even know the temperature to within a degree

In the summer of two thousand and ninety-three

We can expect out summers to be long and very hot

And our winters will be mild and damp like as not

Why should we believe that a heatwave will ignite?

When they can’t even get the two-day forecast right

PERCHED ON THE APPLE BOUGHS

 

Perched on the Apple boughs

The Finches sing a song to please

A song carried on the air, with

The scent of blossom on the breeze

THE BIRD WATCHER

 

Upon the wooded hill

The forest sentinel stood

Made from wind falls

Wooden scraps and ullage

Skillfully fashioned

To become, complete with binoculars

The birdwatcher

 

But all was not as it seemed

For the sentinel

Destined to forever study

What fell before his gaze

Every autumn

Turned his attention upon

His favorite birch tree

Who when the autumn wind blew

Began to shed her leafy canopy

All the year round he studied

In detail her fully covered form

But in the autumn, he could

Revel in her nakedness

The sentinel spoke to himself

“Oh, I’m getting a woody”

And with that his sap began to rise

“Oh no too soon, too soon”

Then all too suddenly it was over

So, upon the wooded hill

The frustrated forest sentinel stood

Staring through his binoculars

And telling himself

“There’s always next year”

BARK

 

Their whole life

Is etched into the bark

The trunks wear their story

To be read with the eye

Or touched like brail

Cracked and weathered

Like the face of an old mariner

Showing what was

And what is still

It protects like a pachyderm’s hide

Its the first line of defence

Against any aggressor

Then when the tree falls

It’s the last to die

SYMPHONIC NATURE

 

Nature fills the world with sound

An infinite orchestra free to air

The wind can caress the trees

Rustling the leaves gently

Or make them beat like a tambourine

It can whistle through canyons

And talk in the high grass

Then add the percussion of distant thunder

Water tumbling down stream

Waves crashing on a rocky shore

And rain falling on a leafy canopy

Then a chorus made up from every creature

The bird world, myriad in variety

From hummingbird to nightingale

To rooks and crows

And then the insects from

Rhythmic crickets to buzzing bees

And animal kind contribute

Howling hounds, roaring big cats

Trumpeting elephants and squeaking mice

And when the elements really get going

They can bring the house down

APRIL SHOWERS

 

The lightning struck, intensely bright, followed in almost the same instance by the thunderclap directly overhead that shook the car.

The rain continued to fall heavily beating a frantic tune on the car roof.

Then almost as quickly as the dark skies arrived, they were gone and the sun was out again although it was a few moments before the April shower stopped completely.

We were parked by the village green which was patterned with strips of freshly cut grass and when we got out of the car the mixture of sun, rain and cut grass the smell was intoxicating.

We locked the car and headed down the lane.

As if the switch on a great sound system had been flicked the bird life in the trees bordering the green exploded into a cacophony of sound as they emerged from their shelters to go about their business.

Then we turned off the lane into the woods where nature and man had left its mark.

The areas that had once been coppiced or pollarded now went their own way and the woods were full of life.

On the borders of woods, the old cut and lay hedge and the ancient hedgerows along the lanes teamed with a great abundance of life of all kinds.

A sobering reflection on this idyllic scene is that all the visible life was either predator or prey but that did not detract from its beauty in fact it enhanced it if anything.

Then the skies darken again, and the rain starts to fall, and we must make a dash for the car.

By the time we reach the car we are soaked to the skin and we quickly scrabble into the car as if it were possible to get any wetter.

Just as I close the door the lightning strikes again and then the thunder shakes the car once more.

What a wonderful and remarkable time spring is in the British Isles.

The unpredictability transforms, almost in a heartbeat, from tranquillity to chaos.

I wouldn’t want to live anywhere else.

WHERE EAGLE’S DARE

 

Over mountains up on high

A lonely Eagle had to fly

For years he had been alone 

In the mountains on his own

Mostly he was a happy lad

But sometimes he got sad

So, decided to fly down below

For some “company” you know

 

It wasn’t a very long journey

Before he reached a leafy tree

Where he met a Tit called Tina

And there the Eagle had her

Then after he had had his way 

He bad farewell and flew away 

So, after the deed was done

And the Eagle had had his fun 

Tina said, “I am a little Tit

And I’ve had a little bit

And I liked it”

 

Over mountains up on high

A lonely Eagle had to fly

For years he had been alone 

In the mountains on his own

Mostly he was a happy lad

But sometimes he got sad

So, decided to fly down below

For some “company” you know

 

It wasn’t a very long journey

Before he reached a leafy tree

And he met a Dove called Daisy

Where the Eagle had her easily

Then after he had had his way 

He bad farewell and flew away 

So, after the deed was done

And the Eagle had had his fun 

Daisy Said, “I am a little dove

And I’ve had a little love

And I liked it”

 

Over mountains up on high

A lonely Eagle had to fly

For years he had been alone 

In the mountains on his own

Mostly he was a happy lad

But sometimes he got sad

So, decided to fly down below

For some “company” you know

 

Its journey wasn’t very harsh

And soon he reached a marsh

Where the met a Duck called Jo

And the Eagle had her just so

Then after he had had his way 

He bad farewell and flew away 

So, after the deed was done

And the eagle had had his fun 

Jo said, “I am a little Drake

And he made a big mistake

But I liked it”

I DO NOT LIKE THAT

As by way of a general ruling

I have made this to be my doctrine

To dislike, distrust, or fear

Any creature meeting these criteria

Anything with more limbs than I

Anything that moves faster than I

Anything with scales or feathers

Anything surviving extreme weathers

Anything having more teeth than I do

Any creature covered in goo

Anything that growls and grunts

That isn’t engaged in sexual stunts

Anything with claws and talons

Anything that drools by the gallons

Anything that’s excessively hairy

Any creature whose eyes are starey

Anything that bites or stings

Anything that uses wings

Anything with horns or armour

Anything with an aggressive demeanour

Anything too small to see

Anything that’s bigger than me

If you think of anything, I've missed

Then I will add them to the list 

PANDERING

 

The Giant Panda

To some extent

Is the architect

Of its predicament

Its choice of habitat

And fussy diet

Contributes greatly

To its demise, I regret

JIMBO

 

I got a new dog from Battersea

And I have called him Jimbo

I now take him to obedience classes

Where they walk us to and fro

 

But when he should be at heel

Jimbo almost always runs away

And then he comes bounding back

When he is supposed to sit and stay

 

Then when he’s walking on the lead

I have to pull young Jimbo back

Or he’s round and round my feet

Until I end up lying on my back

 

We’ve stopped going to the classes

And I have a stick for him to chase

I can forgive my Jimbo anything

When he jumps up to lick my face

SIZE DOESN’T MATTER

 

Gnats as big as Bats

Bats as big as Rats

Rats as big as Cats

Fleas as big as Bees

Bees that eat the Trees

Trees that eat the Cheese

Fly’s that eat pork Pies

Pies that wear bow Ties

Ties that tell you Lies

I see with eyes blinking

Things to get me thinking

God I must stop drinking

BEAR NECESSITIES

 

When in the North America forests

On holiday

Carry with you a whistle

And a can of pepper spray

Because you might meet a bear

 

A small bear eats mainly fruit

And the occasional squirrel

And can be easily scared away

With a sharp blast on your whistle

That’s how to deal with a small bear

 

A large bear won’t be frightened away

By a blast of your whistle

But a squirt of your pepper spray

Will do the trick not a lot just a little

That’s how to deal with a large bear

 

You can check if bears are in the area

By examining their droppings

If it smells of fruit

And contains squirrel fur

Then it was deposited by a small bear

 

However, if the more dangerous large bear

Left its deposit along the way

It will probably contain a whistle

And it will smell of pepper spray